Monday, March 17, 2014

Hollywood Studio Dog Adventures

I am trying out for a new raw food pet diet to be the spokes face for the campaign. Being flown first class to Hollywood is delightful but I don't' see the stewardess?
                                                
 Should I be worried? Stewardess? Oh, Stewardess? I feel cramped in some kind of Louis Vuitton dog cage. This is not first class, hey my clever owner tricked me by throwing dog biscuits into the kennel. Now I'm stuck in the under belly of the plane.  At least I have my alkaline water to sip on. Ooops, the plane just took a dip and so did I. Sorry Mum.


Flight lands and I start to bark to let my owner know to let me out. Designer label or no designer--- dogs do not like being caged up. "Humph!"  I smell sea air and feel warm sunshine. Good ole California. My fur loves that their is no humidity. My fair is soft and pretty.  Being picked up by a charcoal black  Escalade limousine. I am served a nice cool bowl of water.



The chauffeur opens the door and I jump into nice leather seats. I make a circle and then another circle and sit down. I poke my head out the window and check out all the other dogs hanging ten just like me.

  I wonder if everyone knows it's me. There are so many beautiful people everywhere. Ooooh, look a actress at a cafe. It's!!!! It's oh my gosh, what's her name? You know she's on that TV show were they have the Kings all fighting to be a king. You know the blonde who has those two dragons? "Game of Throne's" girl. She is sooo good. Hello? She saw me. She's waving. Oh yes, I've arrived-- to Hollywood finally!!!

The limo drives down Hollywood Blvd just pass the Mann's Chinese theater. Everyone is dressed up as if it is Halloween. I see a Sponge Bodge. He's looking rather shoddy. A strange version of Mickey Mouse, a Cinderella princess and transformers!!! This is the big time!

Time for my walk so where else should I go except Runyon canyon. Everyone is so fit and dong some kind of exercise. I like the yoga class but get kicked out as I just had to go to the bathroom. I saw grass so technically what are the yogi's doing in my bathroom?  On wards up the hill because there are so many dogs here. Hello. Bow Wow Wow to you too.

 Some cool fans have come out to get my autograph. Now the things with fans is that some can be annoying so rule of thumb get them afar. Oh, here they come. Hi, here's my paw-graph. Hey, they took off with my dirty laundry. Welcome to fame and fortune as the new star of  Canine Raw Treats.


















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Saturday, January 5, 2013

Alice In Wonderland: Alice Does Twitter.

Alice In Wonderland Quotes Parody Through Twitter Tweets.

"Oh, my what is this?" Alice said as she picked up a Apple mini.

"It is mine. All mine. Mine to tweet. I tweet. tweet. tweet." The Mad hatter chimed..

"It's a funny looking bird." Alice said with a puzzled look on her face.

"It's not a bird silly. It's a cell phone. And tweet is the rage. I type something in here and click. It goes
to my 103 followers." The mad hatter said.

"You type something to tweet like a bird and people follow?" Alice said trying to understand. "That's a good many people following you."

"That's nothing the Queen has 60 million followers." The Mad Hatter said, "but that is because if they don't she'll cut their heads off."

"Where does she want them to follow her to?" Alice questioned as her eyes grew big to learn more about the mysterious twitter.

"To become popular. The more people who follow you the more you get popular, " the Mad Hatter explained.

"She does need to be a bit more popular," Alice said. "So what does she say so they follow her?"

"Follow me or off with your head. Follow, Follow Follow." The Mad Hatter said with enthusiasm. "I just retreated her tweet."

"What does it sound like?" Alice said with puzzlement.

"It doesn't sound like anything. It doesn't make any noise." The Mad Hatter squeaked.

"A tweet that doesn't sound like anything. That is a fairly odd tweet." Alice said. "So if I were to tweet would I get followers?"

"Depends what you have to offer people? " The Mad Hatter replied.

"Tea. What about tea?" Alice said suggestively.

"Tea! You can't serve tea in a tweet." The Mad Hatter yelled.

"Why not? If you can tweet with no sound then you should be able to serve tea with no tea in a tweet." Alice smartly replied back.

"You can talk about teas. High tea, black tea, gray tea, white tea, tea time and tea leaves but you can't serve tea in a tweet." The Mad Hatter said with a big sigh and then taking a deep breath.

"All this talk about tweeting is making me hungry. I am going to tell my followers to all go eat a tweet!"

"They can't eat a tweet!" The Mad Hatter boasted.

"My tweets are served with eggs and jam." Alice said.

"You can't serve eggs and jam with a tweet." The Mad Hatter said.

"I see that tweets are for eating, drinking and learning where the Queen is or isn't, so I am telling everyone to come have lunch at the Queens house at 12 noon." Alice tweeted. "She won't be back from Holiday until tomorrow.

"I guess you can serve tea with a tweet, " The Mad Hatter said as he tweeted to his followers: Lunch at the Castle: Menu: Tea, eggs and jam.

Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland 
Fun with Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland

Creative writing made for the social media.
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Friday, March 18, 2011

Star Pop Ups at Night

It never fails to amaze oneself when you see stars at night in LA. Oh... I meant in the sky-- but you're probably wondering what star I saw. Well.....I'll tell you. Jeff Goldblum and Kevin Spacey. What? Where you ask?
First I went out to happy hour at the famed Le Bohe'me in West Hollywood on Santa Monica Blvd. The usual suspects were there: actors, writers, film makers and the artists who you have yet to learn our names. An actor parading as a waiter enticed us to try a delicious sampling of fillet Mignon tacos, duck quesadilla and bacon wrapped dates. He was so good in "sells" that we tried both the orange margarita and raspberry white Godiva martinis which set the mood to enjoy the night.
When the sun went down we headed to Cafe Was in Hollywood on Sunset at Vine. No one goes out till it's dark in Los Angeles. Vampires mostly, creatures of the dark. O.k. stars need dark to show up!
We pulled up to the joint and entered as the paparazzi were waiting outside like buzzards circling for their crumbs. They flashed their bulbs as we starlets went into Was. The placed was packed with Hollywood hipsters. (411= people dressed in a casual creative way to sport good will mixed with designer wear) Everyone was enjoying the jazz tunes of none other than Mr. Jurassic Park himself, Jeff Goldblum. Jeff (were friends like that) played the piano as a group of really sheik 20's flappers crossed with Melrose/punk danced with each other and wrapped each other up in a pearl necklace. It was long, really long.

Jeff knew how to play up to the crowd. He has star power and is very handsome in a Buddy Holidayish vibe. He wears the rims well. rims=spectacles, glasses, eye wear. My friend Cristianne Miranda got to do a solo song with JBlum. She seemed to raise the roof as she belted out a jazz tune. Other girls popped up to sing along as Jeff and his band Mildred Snitzer played music. But when Kevin Spacey popped up to sing it was like a shooting star bursting on stage. Kevin was a very pleasant surprise to the crowd. KSpace was quite good and I'm sure he has a album coming out. I'm that confident in his skills.

I was enjoying dreamy KSpace as a director/writer guy who said he had to get his script to Spacey said hello to me. 411 You'll always meet a guy who knows the Spacey's and has a movie deal at a studio. It's part of your alluring charm as a actor to attract the real "producers" in LA. He the "producer" wants me to read for him but first I should have dinner with him. Huh? Dinner before acting? Never, I'm full from happy hour. Call my agent and book me. I'm friends with Tarrentino, you know. (The old throw out a big name. Everyone does it.) Friend=someone you know their name in LA. I do know him from watching his movies. Duh? And, I met him while serving up a baked chicken. So I can use the word "friend" technically now. Well, I'll have to tell you about that adventure next time.

I got a acting class on Saturday with a big casting director. So see you at the movies. who knows I just might pop as a break out star by then.

lol

M

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